Chemo Round Three: Kick Cancer in the Face!

On Monday, I met with my Plastic Surgeon who filled my expanders. I am very pleased with how they are shaping up compared to the beginning stages. I would show pictures if I didn't think that may be a tid-bit inappropriate for the Internet anyways. I have had more than I can count look at my new breasts in person. It's funny because I don't feel the least bit inhibited by this. Maybe because they really aren't mine? I mean the insides aren't theoretically mine. Maybe because I am becoming less insecure. Maybe because they are just breast after all! This fill is probably my last. I will keep the expanders through the duration of my treatment and once my blood count is good I can have my surgery. This is far out so I am not thinking about this just yet. While I was at this appointment my doctor asked if a possible patient could take a peek. I said sure. I mean everyone and their mother has seen them at this point and I am not shy about it. This woman was in her fifties, my guess. She had received a lumpectomy by the same surgical oncologist I had five years ago and has now been diagnosed with breast cancer. Early stages but still breast cancer. She had only just found out five weeks ago and was at my plastic surgeons office for a consult regarding the bi-lateral mastectomy with reconstruction. She would be receiving the expanders after surgery just as I did should she choose this option. This woman was so sweet and terrified. You could see it in her eyes. She was teary-eyed just speaking about her diagnoses. I let her look at my breast to see how they turned out. I explained how scared I was for my surgery, but  Dr. W was the best and she would be in great hands. I spoke to her about how I went through a range of emotions and have been very open with my journey. I gave her my signature "Heather Hug" and let her know that the MOST important thing she can do throughout her journey is have a Positive state of mind. Stay strong mentally! After meeting her I felt compassion for this woman whose life is beginning to go upside down. I know. I have been there and am going through it!

Round Three is not fun!! I had my usual routine blood draw, met with my Doctor and vitals were checked. I am pleased to announce that the five pound increments of weight are not consistent so I weighed in the same as two weeks ago. I am happy to not continue weight gain but know that it is mostly due to my depleting appetite. At my appointment it was discussed how harsh the nausea was on round two along with the fatigue and achy bone pain. For these side effects they decided to change up my anti nausea meds I receive via IV. I cant remember the name but instead of Zofran I am receiving something that begins with an A.... As for the fatigue and bone pain I will be receiving IV fluid and some other medicine that begins with a T..Tordol (?) on Friday in hopes that I can have a pleasant weekend. Fingers Crossed!!

So handsome in his uniform XOXO

*I have to brag a bit about how wonderful my littles are before continuing. On Chemo Day,Tuesday, I went with my husband to drop off the littles at preschool. My dear sweet Grayson asked me before leaving the house if I could go inside the school to show off my head!! LOL! When I went inside without any hat he was ecstatic. He was so proud that I was his mom and I got teary-eyed as I was leaving him in his classroom after the hundredth hug and kiss. It completely melted my heart. The innocence of children always surprises me. What would otherwise receive an not-understanding glare or ignorant comment from an adult who has no clue other than the personal judgement and criticism they feel pardoned to turns out to be a beautiful acceptance and honest lovely pride from a child. I am and always will be one of those moms who will hold onto a tight embrace until they are ready to let go. I will tell them I love them a million times a day if I feel the urge to do so. In this moment my heart really could have burst! Also have to brag how awesome he looks in his karate uniform. okay. That is all. Brag session over.*

Back to Chemo Round Three. It was just as the other two treatments had gone. I had a different nurse. This time nurse K. I received my new anti nausea concoction, my strawberry daiquiri followed by my clear liquid. This round I met a fantastic women who just lit up my world quite literally. Her energy was tangible to say the least. She is in her fifties, has three children, one of which is autistic, just finished her chemo in June just before I began mine, is currently taking radiation and will be having her hysterectomy with mastectomy using tissue transfer from her stomach. She gave me a bag full of hats to wear and sat and talked with David and I for a good while. She discussed how this changed her life and she values her family time now more than ever. She just wants to go to Disney when all is said and done. She refers to my AC treatment as the Anti-Christ, secretly may I say, I agree. It is awful! She had the same chemo treatment I am going through and gave me insights into tricks she did to feel better and cope. She was this really rad, hippie, laid back, energetic, and funny woman. Her attitude about everything was remarkable. She was high energy and ready to be done with everything. She stated to only focus on one thing at a time. Get by one portion before thinking of the next. After meeting this amazing, strong, energetic survivor I was thinking how I hope to continue my journey with as much emphasis on life and survival.

All ready for my torture

The Strawberry Daiquiri

Later after treatment around 5:30pm I began feeling intense nausea. This time I really came the closest I have ever been to throwing up. I could only stomach the delicious but high sodium Ramen noodles for dinner, took my anti nausea pill and went to bed.

Day two, Wednesday, I woke feeling awful. Sore throat and nauseous with no appetite. I went in for my routine Neulasta injection and went to bed early with the littles.

Today is day three, Thursday and I woke up feeling like I had been hit by a truck. That awful flu-like achy feeling with warmth of a fever but lack of one. Still nauseous. I took all my meds including Claritin and Advil to help with the injection side effects and think I may play sleeping beauty today.

This week is still not over as tomorrow I have another round of IV liquids to hopefully make me feel better. I had a good week all in all. I met two amazing women. One who is just beginning her journey and one whose journey is coming to an end. It is a reminder to me how this cancer nonsense is an epidemic. There are so many lives touched by cancer it is ridiculous. For my journey,  I will stay strong and continue to kick this cancer in the face because I AM STRONGER than my CANCER.

With Love & Hugs,
Heather