Give Thanks

Lately, I find I am trying to do everything. Key word: TRYING. Be a good friend, weed out those that are no longer worthy of my friendship...Yes I used WORTHY because my friendship is something to be valued! Keeping up with the daily mundanes, laundry...The beast that it is. Really for 4 of us there is an extreme amount of laundry going on in our household. Probably because I refuse to go clothes shopping until I am back at a steady weight and no longer fluctuating from puffy to normal. When I use NORMAL, I mean my normal...the size I will be comfortable, happy and more importantly healthy in. Be a present daughter, be a great wife and mother, and be there for myself....all of these are a part of the EVERYTHING I am talking about.

In the madness of our daily "Witching Hour" my husband will always say in his snarky smart ass tone, we should of had two more. Well, (Mr. PIMA for the present moment because of said comment,) the truth is I really would love to have 2 more, although unless adoption or fostering come up in our future it really is not a possibility. No matter how Crazed my days are or how out of fuel...I'm talking past the point of no return...dead Zombie state..tired I am. I still would have loved to have more children.
All he hears are the screaming and crying. The uncontrollable meltdown because one of his toy cars fell off the couch. All he sees is the chaos. At least in that present moment. Although, I am witnessing the same as my husband during the horrid "Witching Hour," I see Love. I see our little unique growing children becoming more and more independent. I see our family progressing, often much faster than i would agree with. I have learned to tune out that screaming and crying and instead replace with the soft melancholy of, Enya.

Even though we clearly disagree with the number of children we have had, and fight for the time to have a date night...primarily due to not having a babysitter it gets pushed away for another week, month, or months. Even though, we both are working our asses completely to a road rash fleshy burn. Even though exhaustion doesn't even begin to explain my energy level. Even though in some ways life before marriage and children may have been "Easier." I would never trade in my life now for any alternative...Not even all the money and luxuries money could buy. The truth is without all the hectic ferocity that my children bring to my life, and the love that my husband fulfills in my heart, and the beastly laundry, exhaustion that never leaves, my forever friends, the struggle for date night, and the extreme effort it takes to carve out "Me Time." Well, without all of the obstacles, and people I hold dear to my heart, my children, my husband, truth is, I wouldn't be Me. I wouldn't have an identity. I would be a numb, mindless, blank, shell of a human just adrift with the wind. Instead, I am grounded and have permission of free movement with the choices I make. My life is mine to create, restructure, build onto, and live how I choose. For this I am ever so THANKFUL. So as Turkey Day approaches, I have a deeper appreciation for my Life. Deeper than the appreciation my tummy will have for all the yummy goodies it will devour in mounted platefuls on Thursday!

I will not use the analogy, "When Life Gives You Lemons" because life doesn't just give you "Lemons!" Ohhh NOO No no NO no NO!  Life gives you : Stomach Bugs, Diarrhea, Headaches, & MIGRAINES just to name a few. And when I am peeing out my butt, sweating on the toilet, afraid my insides may literally fall right out of my ass and my son tells my daughter "Be quiet, baby. Mommy doesn't feel well."
It is in those moments that I know I am right where I am supposed to be!

2005

2006

2007

2008

2009 - Engagement Party

2010 - David Turns 30

2011 - Married

 

 

1st Baby Bump

2011 - Baby #1

2011-World Meets Baby Grayson

2012

2nd and Last baby Bump

2013 - Baby #2

2013 - World Meets Baby Starr

This is not the end nor the beginning but a road more traveled on called The Journey. It is a Journey filled with Love, Happiness, Laughter, Joy, Struggles, Pain, and lots of Bumps along the way, but rightfully Our Journey!